Heratio’s Hot Ham

Have you ever had one of those days where it seems like everyone only does things to hurt you. Those days where if someone doesn’t reply to your message immediately you assume that they hate you now. Those days are the worst. It always seems like the horrible feeling won’t go away and for me those days are brought on by the smallest things. I over-analyze every situation and that’s what brings on these kinds of days for me. I see the worst case scenario in a situation and convince myself that it’s the only thing that can happen. It’s horrible to think this way and I hate it. It’s why I can get depressed so easily, it’s why I can get angry so easily, it really just causes me a lot of problems and I don’t know how to stop. I try not to over analyze things, but it never works. I don’t know when I started doing this or why, but I want it to stop. I tried for almost four years to find a romantic relationship and now that I’ve found something that somewhat resembles one, I’m upset most of the time. Not because it’s a bad situation. She’s an amazing girl and I really care about her, but every moment I’m not with her I can only see horrible things happening. I see her finding someone else, I see her deciding I’m not worth it, I only see bad endings and I shouldn’t. There’s absolutely no signs or anything pointing to things ending badly, I just see things that way because I over analyze every single thing. Sometimes it get’s so bad that I get physically nauseous and can’t do anything but sit and look sad. I don’t have a solution to this problem and I don’t really have a reason to write about it. Maybe I think it will help. I don’t know, but I haven’t made any posts lately and this is what’s been on my mind pretty much the entire time I haven’t been posting.

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